Wednesday, June 24, 2009


Lately I have been feeling a bit like a chicken running around with it's head cut off. I have this crazy "to do" list a mile long and I feel like I can't do anything else until those 'things' get checked off. Only here is the problem, life is going on around me and I'm standing still while my family whirls around me. I want to engage but that 'list' keeps pulling me back! UGH! So this morning God woke me up extra early, 6:24a.m. to be exact! I layed there and tried to fall back asleep to no avail so I popped out of bed and started a load of laundry, only that's not what God wanted me to do. He wanted me to grab His word and my coffee and park myself on the patio and be refreshed. I didn't listen. I couldn't find 'my' bible, I had left it in the pew at church. And when I decided to get my back up bible, I realized that my husband shared that one with someone. Instead of grabbing one of my husbands (many) bibles, I sat down and sulked. It went something like this, "see, i can't even have my own quiet time, I am so unorganized and now my bible is not where it needs to be and I don't want to read someone else's bible, I wanted my bible." Ewe as I type this Willie Wonka is playing in my head..."I want a golden egg daddy, why can't I have a golden egg" and with that SELFISH ran through my head. I have been allowing my own selfishness to sabotage myself! Silly right? Yet as I sit and reflect that happens a lot! I get in my own way!
John 10:10 says the thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that you may have life and have it to the full."
In my selfishness of my self imposed "to do" list I have allowed the thief to steal my JOY! UGH So for the rest of this morning, if you need me, I'll be on the patio with my husband's bible and my coffee, Join me!!